May 13, 2006

Insecurity Breeds Contempt

Sick of the war, real or imagined, between working and stay-at-home moms? Read this. It should be the final word.

It won't be of course, because too many people make a damned good buck out of promoting the notion that the fairer sex is continually at each other's throats. Backed by a thousand pound boulder of insecurity, nobody trusts their own choices to stand on their own. Nope, we have to disparage, question and judge what everybody else is doing. Eyes on your own paper, people.

I'm sitting here trying to think of mommies I fight with. There are none. Everyone I know actually does some combination of at-home/at-work. Depends on the ages of the kids, depends on the fields we work in, depends on who we're taking care of. Many women I know feel the pull of taking care of their parents more acutely than taking care of their kids. Of course that's the age I'm at presently, and it's different for other generations.

If you like what you do and it works for you, do it. If your present choice is making your quality of life hellish, change it. Having children doesn't qualify you for sainthood, nor should it spell the end of your life as an individual.

How about we unclench our fists and hold hands on this one?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

As a society, we seem to have this need to denigrate what other people do--or do not do--for a living. As a retired teacher, I have been on the wrong end of the teacher-bashing stick far too many times. Why is it that mere acquaintances feel compelled to complain about how you earn your living sans any knowledge of whether you're any good at it? I have been bashed by machinists, truck drivers, advertising executives, lawyers and a brother-in-law. I wonder when we will actually have the confidence to trust that other people actually do a good job, that they truly are worth their salaries--and then get on with our own lives. I have always told my students to be proud of what they do--whatever it happens to be. We all make a contribution to the collective good in our own way. That's what I believe. That's what I hope.

May 13, 2006 1:33 PM  

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