August 14, 2006


Crabby Applesauce Face

That's our name for, well, crabby people. It's actually a name I learned from a couple who were my parent's friends, Kay and Gayle. Some kid called Katie that one time, and it stuck. Like Mom and Dad, they're gone and I miss them terribly.

Anyway, you may have noticed that darling Ms. Motherlode has been on a bit of a rant of late, truly a crabby applesauce face. You're not imagining it. Life has been tossing me curve balls faster than I can dust off the plate, and it's taking its toll.

People often ask me what I want to be when I grow up. They ask me what the grand plan is to all this, well, stuff. Easy, I tell them. World Domination. Capitalized like that. Hold your shorts - I get that I'm not there yet. I get that I'm not close, I get that I probably never will be. But we are obligated to paddle our own canoe, and you can steer yours anywhere you want.

I get cranky when real world stuff bumps into my quest. When I have to stop to clean up cat pee, when I have to fill out forms to try and sort out the boys school issues, when I have to take the van in for a tuneup, when the fridge is perpetually empty, when the new Vanity Fair comes out and I have to drop everything and sit on the swing...wait, forget that last one.

In truth, I'm going through a truckload of very stressful issues. It's damned hard to put on a happy face when the chore of putting one foot in front of the other seems impossible. And so I tend to rant.

I'm getting to my point. Stay with me. I've been asked how I plan to achieve this, er, World Domination. (I don't put the 'er' in there, other people do). I have always said the same thing - the children and the women. If you want to change the world, replace hope with despair. And the easiest place to instill hope is in a child. The best way to craft a fair society is to educate the women, who will pass that on to their children.

I'm not a man-hater. No, though that certainly would have made my life an easier trek if I was. But face it guys - you've had your shot, and you've messed it up.

Want to feel the power of this? Check out this story in today's Star. Feel the power that grandmothers have - historically one of the least listened to factions of society. Women get it. They always have. The AIDS conference has been going on all week in Toronto, and following the politics and science and humanity of this issue is an absolute necessity for all of is. This matters. Stephen Lewis, who is just a hero if you ask me, has helped spearhead Canada's involvement in the AIDS crisis. This classy guy brings a sense of urgency, a sense of humour, and a sense of hope to everything he touches.

You know how when the Olympics are on, and you find yourself cheering for some Canadian in some sport you never previously knew existed? You run around yelling that 'we' got a medal in it? That's what we do with Stephen Lewis. This man fuels his own fight. The 'voice' of Canada, PM Stephen Harper, didn't even show at this international conference. Talk about a total dissing of one of the most important issues facing this world today. Not convinced? Do some research and check out the staggering statistics. Staggering.

The rest of the world matters, and much more than the tiny little sliver that I occupy. My problems are what some call First World Problems - and I should be ashamed of myself. I am.

I don't care what you drive, I don't care how many toys you can buy your kids, I don't care if Winners is opening a new store around the corner. When the day has come that we finally no longer care how real human beings are being treated, either far away or right in front of us, we have lost. And get your head out of your butt - we know exactly how the world is working. Thanks to the magic of this very machine you're staring at, we have never had the opportunity to access more information.

How sad and shameful that we continue to use it to remove ourselves from the suffering.

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