October 20, 2006


Don't Blame Me

Oh, ferchristsakes. I've had it. How is every single thing that famous people get caught is doing because of booze, pills, abuse or a bad mother?

Slate does a lovely roundup of the latest bunch of spineless badboys. It's a perfect step-by-step guide for eluding blame and responsibility.

Whatever happened to 'take your lumps'? What ever happened to admit it, suck it up, move on? No wonder our kids are so great at blaming teachers for lousy grades and their friends for getting them into trouble. Nice examples we've set for them.

Let's be clear: I put the alcohol in my body that made me say or do dumb things. If I gain weight, it's because of the food I stuck in my mouth. If I yell at my kids too much, it's because I didn't bother to fix something that was broken and take care of old hurts. If I got pregnant, it was because - well, I could go on, but I don't think I need to.

My screw ups are not my parents fault. This generation has had more access to more information and help than any other. We've also had enough hours of Oprah and Dr. Phil to be able to recognize that the sins of the father (or mother) do not sentence the son (or daughter) to a lifetime of excuses.

Have you ever tried to follow a lie down the daisy chain of experience? Of course you have. Everyone has. You can only do it for so long, and then you just have to put your head down and surrender. The trick is to learn something, and grow. I'm so fed up with this terminal toddler behaviour from supposed adults.

The human condition is to follow pleasure and avoid pain. But part of being an adult is to learn delayed gratification - do the work up front, enjoy the fruits of your labour later. Dinner before dessert.

I'm far more likely to accept a display of your strengths if you're open about your weaknesses.

I like my humans human.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Amen!

October 21, 2006 3:24 PM  

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