December 19, 2006


Where to start? Donald Trump has decided to give Miss USA a second chance. Seems this year's tartlette has been out boozing and hounding around, actions apparently unbecoming of a beauty queen. Trump, that reknowned purvayor of classy behaviour and stellar judgement, has decided that she just wanted a slice of New York, and it went to her purdy little head, and like many before her, she's just fallen victim to all those sparkly things that temporarily turned her head from chasing world peace. Or another bikini. Or something.

They still have a Miss USA? Are you joking? I thought girls just got their implants and went straight to Hollywood. Silly me.

It gets better.

A report from the Independent in the UK outlines the terrible news that millions don't read well enough to perform a very important part our culture. Employment, you might ask yourself? Are they unable to keep a job? Fill out a government application? Maybe they're sadly unable to read bedtime stories to their children. Perhaps they are a menace on the roadways, unable to read simple highway signs.

If any of this were true, it would indeed be sad, dangerous even. But no, the literacy problem apparently translates into millions being unable to participate in karaoke. I can read quite well. I've never performed karaoke. You're welcome.

I wonder if Miss USA can do it?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please, please, please stop blogging.

Go look in a mirror. Right now. Look straight in that mirror and look into your eyes. Look deep inside yourself. You know you are a boring, uninteresting, gray person. You know that nobody gives a toss what you think. You have seen your site stats. You know that the only people who come to read this probably feel sorry for you. Just give it up. You are destined to a life of being the woman nobody can quite remember. The gray woman in the corner of the room. Just stop. Stop pretending. We know, you know. Dull.

December 27, 2006 3:46 PM  

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