February 27, 2009

Any Idiot Knows Birds Are Noisier Than Kids

A reader who shall rename nameless (well, maybe not. It was my sister Roz) sent me this article:

NEW ORLEANS–A Louisiana woman is accused of trading two young children in her care for a pet cockatoo and $175 in cash.

Donna Greenwell, 53, is charged with aggravated kidnapping. Also charged are Paul Romero, 46, and Brandy Lynn Romero, 27.

Greenwell allegedly called the Romeros about a cockatoo they were selling for $1,500. After hearing the Romeros were unable to have a child, she allegedly offered the five-year-old boy and four-year-old girl for money. The Romeros couldn't afford it, so she agreed to trade the kids for the bird, plus $175.

But she had no authority to put the children up for adoption. She's not their mother.

She often shares clips with me. It's quite thoughtful of her. Usually. This one, she sent with the following in the subject line: I Thought This Was Your Column.

Refusing to take the bait, I calmly replied that everyone knows I hate cockatoos. I don't even like cocaones. Her considered answer was, "that's true".

Besides, everyone knows if it was about me, the headline would read, Ontario Woman Accused of Trading Her Two Children for a Big Mac Combo and a Fake Houseplant.

Let's start the bidding.


Blogger OmemeeOzzie said...

Just to be 100% clear... how fake? Walmart fake or Art Shoppe fake?

Would this trade be permanent or until all required winter clean up and spring cleaning is done?

Just to be clear, you understand.

February 27, 2009 5:31 PM  
Blogger DJW said...

Do they do roofs or car repairs?

February 27, 2009 6:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

how bout an even trade for two teenage females? Not sure which one of us would be getting the shorter stick here.....

February 27, 2009 6:33 PM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

Ah, you lot are delusional. The cost of groceries alone would assure you never forgave me.

And sorry A, I've been a teenage girl, and it makes me appreciate having teenage boys....though obviously not much.

February 27, 2009 6:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

IS this a spin off of of what remains from Katrina? I smell a reality show in the making...C'mon you guys. You love your kids, well, maybe some of the time. Look at the all the spare time we would have??? Boring you say? Oh too dream!!!


February 28, 2009 5:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A Big Mac combo. At least get a real burger.

February 28, 2009 9:22 AM  
Blogger Nursedude said...

Would you want to biggie size the fries?

March 01, 2009 4:13 PM  

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