February 26, 2009

Thursday is the New Black

It appears I am hellbent on making Thursdays miserable for myself lately. Last week's rant was just full of ranty goodness, and today is shaping up (looks at clock - realizes 3 in the afternoon is sorta late for 'shaping up') to be more of the same.

I decided that it is tax time. This means spreading out a year's worth of paper all over the dining room table. While that is a lovely excuse to not make dinner ('well, we can hardly dine when we have no table'), I have to admit that all I've managed to do is sort things into 3 piles: business stuff, house and kid stuff, and garbage. And the garbage is mostly envelopes that I didn't bother to open all year. I wish the places that send statements telling you how much money you no longer have would send out a statement yearly, instead of every week or two. I get it. We're broke. Put that postage and stationary cost back into my account, thankyouverymuch.

I just slopped a cup of tea all over the mousepad. While I'm sure I should be happy I didn't slop it into the keyboard (which, let's be honest: I could probably stick in a stock pot and make soup from), now I have a soggy mousepad. Maggie hopped up there as she always does, glared at me and hopped down, so now I have a soggy mousepad covered in cat hair.

Ari let me know the other night that the printer is only printing in pink. We just spent about 80 bucks replacing both cartridges, and it's still printing pink. Which means the printer is pooched. Now, ordinarily that would make me snarly, but we have a new spare one in the basement. We bought two last year cuz there was a deal, and the printers only cost $25. NOW, WILL SOMEONE TELL ME WHY A PRINTER COSTS 25 DOLLARS BUT TO REPLACE THE DAMNED INK IN THEM COSTS 80??? I am trying to not throw out things, but a whole printer is way bigger than two dinky cartridges. I hate computer companies.

I feel guilty. The lady came around collecting for the Heart & Stroke Foundation last night. She is a nice lady. And I had to say no, because in January I collected for the March of Dimes, but I did such a lousy job that I had to write a big cheque to cover up what a lousy job I did. Foundations should not want you to collect in snowstorms, in the month that everyone gets their Visa bills in after Christmas.

I had to pay nearly 300 bucks to fix the washing machine last week. The little pump piece is as big as my fist, and it cost that much. The washer is three years old, it's a front loader worth fixing, but this is the 2nd fix, and I'm standing there thinking how much it cost new, and realize I'm back to the same debate (see: whining about printer, above). MAKE THIS STUFF LAST LONGER. Planned obsolescence is what got us into this unholy mess. I shouldn't have to buy vacuums and washers and stoves and fridges and all those other totally unfun things more than every second decade.

I have been whapped on the head by first Arlene, and then Roz for my previous posts. Arlene: "I went to open that G&M economy piece, saw it was 6 pages, and decided 'nope Lorraine, I am not going 6 pages for you'..."
Roz" "I opened that Rockefeller stuff in the Vanity Fair link, and after 3 pages I just gave up. Geez...just tell me how it ends."

Fine. I will now only post knock knock jokes for the attention-impaired.

I gave up on Lost this season. That is all. I told the Poor Sod, no matter how hot the guys are, I just can't do this show anymore. He looked really unhappy about that.

It is beyond depressing to read that many States are opening prisons at rates that are seemingly in direct proportion to how fast they're closing schools.

I bought Moen taps because they're supposed to be so great. They have a lifetime warranty. They keep busting, and when I go into Home Despot or wherever they came from, they are cheerful enough in handing over replacement cartridges. All I have managed to do is pay a lot of money for something that breaks repeatedly, and I (well, okay, The Poor Sod, usually) gets to keep replacing them. THEY ARE NOT AT ALL SURPRISED THAT THESE THINGS KEEP BREAKING. IT IS DEFEATING THE WHOLE DAMNED PREMISE OF QUALITY. IF YOU POSITION YOURSELF AT THE TOP OF THE MARKET, AT LEAST HAVE THE DECENCY TO PRETEND TO BE WILDLY SURPRISED IF A CUSTOMER HAS ONE BREAK.

It should not be called 'dusting'. It should be called 'undusting'.

I now have to go bang around pots so everyone can eat off their laps.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lorraine, three words designed to make your home life easier; (faucets) Crane, (washer-dryer) Whirlpool Ultimate Care series Commercial Quiet Wash. they are very tough, ez to use and do not break down. That has been a good brand for a long time. I remember the one we had in 1974 when it was still a division of RCA. As for printers, I found the Hewlett Packard 1020 very good. If you need color, you'll have to get a higher rated one with color toner, but these are good printers too.

February 26, 2009 5:38 PM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

I have Whirlpool already! I gave up on HP printers last go round, and I can't afford to replace all the faucets that are peeving me.


Next time.

February 26, 2009 5:46 PM  
Blogger DJW said...

Nice to see life is the same all over.

I have a $0.49 part broken in my transmission. Not too bad you say? It's buried deep inside the beast.
$600 to change the offending clip.

You've read the tales of my roof and appliance woes.

It will all have to wait till after my taxes are back

There, do ya feel better now?


February 26, 2009 6:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

omg, welcome to my life!!


February 26, 2009 7:09 PM  
Blogger DJW said...


Washer/Dryer...Frigidare Gallery Series...6 years, no problems

February 26, 2009 8:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And I thought I was having a pissy day? "Welcome to my World".. isn't that how the song goes? Well, Noah seems to have had the right idea, we're all in this together, climb aboard. Same BS, different location...Lorraine, look up or maybe not??? Things can only get better, at least I hope they do, for all of us!!!...


February 27, 2009 8:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can only suggest two things that I have found helpful - 1)alcohol, 2) hormone therapy.

February 27, 2009 8:55 AM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

Beat you to the first one, not quite ready for the second...

But, I'll obviously keep you posted!

February 27, 2009 9:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait a minute. You city folk have a MACHINE that washes your clothes???

February 27, 2009 11:05 AM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

Not even gonna ask about your vacuum situation, anon....

February 27, 2009 11:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

On your printer - they probably lose money on every one they sell. They are really in the business of selling you 25 cents worth of ink in a one dollar cartridge for the low low price of $40.00 per colour. Just like flashlights they would give them away just to get you to buy batteries.

February 27, 2009 11:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

that's what you get for doing 5000 loads of laundry per week.

Attention Impaired Roz

February 27, 2009 4:03 PM  

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