April 25, 2009


Susan Boyle

Oh, jeezus. You may have noticed I pretty much never comment on the ludicrous crap that passes for popular culture these days. I've never mentioned American Idol, or Survivor, or Lindsay Lohan, or how desperate the housewives are. I just don't care, and fueling the fire can only lead to more ludicrous crap. And it has; there are bazillions of websites devoted to this nonsense. I have thus far refused to be Satan's pawn.

But, man, all this squawking about Susan Boyle has headed into overdrive, and I have a comment.

She's the wonder from Scotland that made everyone all weepy when she sang for Simon Cowell. She was presumably too ugly to live, but turned out to be alright enough to sing. Now, she's taking it on all sides because she had a 'makeover'. I don't need to give you a link - open your front door and you'll trip over one.

She's had the audacity, after she's had something like 20 million hits on Youtube for her prowess in winning over an audience who were rude and judgmental, to get a little scrub up.

Listen. If you go from nobody taking your picture unless you get arrested, to having the world's press assault you from every angle, you'd get a little prettier too. She got a hairdo. She got her brows plucked. She ditched her brocade dress for a leather jacket. Hell, that sounds exactly like something I'd do. Because I did.

Okay, I never wore brocade. But for the most part, I sit in my kitchen wearing torn out old army pants and my son's hoodies. When I suddenly had to have my picture in the paper, I started getting my hair cut 3 times a year instead of once. I still hack away - near-sightedly - at my bangs on my own every few weeks. And come on, I get a handful of people seeing my pic - Susan is getting 20 million. And the word is that people are turning on her? Really?

So the woman has the voice of a lark and eyebrows that look like caterpillars. If we hadn't turned the music industry into the soul-sucking crapfest it is (video killed the radio star, indeed), she needn't have bothered to buff it up, unless she wanted to for herself. But as long as we keep demanding that every damned artist be pretty enough, or commercial enough, or stylish enough to even get through the door, I say back off.

Why on earth aren't they picking on the no-talents who are *only* pretty? Seriously. Good looking people are like shark's teeth - there will forever be another row ready to move up as needed. Has anyone accidentally flipped on that monstrosity, The Apprentice? Explain to me Joan Rivers' face, please. Then explain why her daughter, looks exactly like her plastic, creepy mother. My mom and I used to go shopping together all the time. Just not for new faces.

There has been much reportage that people are mean, and that Susan Boyle was judged harshly for her looks. There has been foot shuffling and feel-good tears as she defied the naysayers and stood her ground as she opened her mouth. They loved her!

And now they don't! She's not dumpy enough anymore!

Man, are we mean. What kind of message are our kids getting from all of this?

5 Comments:

Blogger OmemeeOzzie said...

Regradless of how anyone looks, their talent ought to be enough. Regretably, that is not the case today. We demand that those in the spotlight look as if they belong -- even if it is only for those fleeting 15 minutes. Why? We like to deny success to plain, ordinary people? Let's hope that's not the case. Even some of today's less-than-perfect individuals attempt to look better than their Mother ever intended as they stumble pantie-less from a limo in the middle of the night --without the appearance of 5 o'clock shadow. Nary a caterpillar in sight! Unless, of course you are either Amy Whitehouse or Pete Doherty who almost seem to insist on being photographed with what appear to be festering sores and other unsightly yet natural facial occurrences... Is it wrong to appear normal?

April 26, 2009 2:43 PM  
Anonymous buzzwhack said...

Yeah, but "Would you ask Tom Petty to doll up for a tv appearance?"
with no apologies to Billy Bob Thornton.

April 26, 2009 5:36 PM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

"Have him washed and brought to my tent," to quote Cher....

April 26, 2009 6:39 PM  
Blogger DJ said...

I agree with the Bionic Man (Ozzie)

We have, in our house compiled what we call the Ugly Canadian Rock Band.

Geddy Lee, Niel Young, Joni Mitchell, Kim Mitchell, Carol Pope and others.

All fantastic and truly gifted talents with great voices. But all made it big before videos.

Wonder how they'd do if they were starting out today?

DJW

April 26, 2009 9:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Such is life now in the music field.. All cosmetics and no talent. Too bad most who judge, sign record contracts, have no ear for good music or singers but eyes and droll for the sleazy, and you can fill in the rest. For Susan, the woman with the voice of a lark, all the best. I don't think she had mommy or daddy to get into the limelight. She did it on your own and pure talent...

Rob...

April 27, 2009 6:48 AM  

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