November 17, 2009

Sarah Palin & My Cat

Have you read Sarah Palin's new book yet? Neither has she.

I caved to temptation and watched Oprah yesterday. I knew what it would be. It was. Out pops Miss Alaska, and my first thought was, "my, doesn't she have great hair! And look at those highlights. Hmmm."

You see, this is a problem. You're not supposed to notice highlights like that. I bet none of you see me and think, "why, it looks like Lorraine spends 150 bucks on highlights!". No. You don't think that at all. You just notice this overall stunning effect from my overpriced tending. Right?

I can see Sarah's highlights from my porch.

Oprah, we never knew ye. How dare you softball this Vanity Project in a Pair of Heels? You eviscerated James Frey for stretching the truth; you smiled warmly at Sarah Palin for re-inventing it.

And for all the nutters believing she has been redeemed? Really? Let's sit around and talk about our kids, and our clothes. Let's discuss making dinner. That crap is easy to talk about. Oprah mentioned a few lines from the book, and Sarah looked at her blankly like she was hearing it for the first time. A friend howled at the script of how Todd reacted when she told him their unborn son had DS. Oprah had to remind her of Todd's reaction - 3 times - until she remembered.

I'm still angry at her for never acknowledging what Obama did when the media descended on her family. He loudly, and eloquently, and immediately, told them to back off. Back off of her family. And she still refuses to acknowledge this class act. Oprah had to press her 3 times on that one as well, as she tried to waltz around. Trust me; anyone with children they were desperately trying to shield would have remembered this forever. So that leaves these choices: she is the one person who didn't hear him, she didn't care about protecting her children, or she's a liar.

I'm still not sure I understand her explanation of why she looked like a moron with Katie Couric. Can you really not name a single magazine you read? Really? By that point, the woman had been in more airports than a piece of luggage that Air Canada has lost. All she had to do was glance at the stand. And let's be real: the only person who could have given her a more tender interview than Katie Couric was Bambi.

She's a very attractive lady. She's also arrogant, stubborn and as introspective as my cat Maggie, who is sitting here eating an entire piece of pizza she found. I told her it wasn't good for her. She didn't care. I told her she'd bitten off more than she could chew. She didn't believe me. I explained that her ambition - to consume an entire piece of pizza - was bigger than her capabilities.

Maggie just walked away from the pizza. Wish I could say the same for Sarah Palin.


Blogger OmemeeOzzie said...

There are at least 7 million reasons why she won't walk away. Too bad. She's out for yet another 15 minutes of fame. I believe I would rather read Maggies thoughts on why she thought she could eat a slice of pizza than turn a page of Palin's ghost-written tome.

November 17, 2009 3:06 PM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

She's on the laptop. I'll let you know when it's done.

November 17, 2009 3:13 PM  
Anonymous Viny said...

she really makes me want to yank her hair out from the roots. she claims that aborting a child with ds is the "easier" way out that women are tempted with? what bull. i work with parents whose kids have special needs...believe me, there is no easy way, and abortion may seem "easy" to her, but it isn't. most parents make that decision with the heavy heart of knowing that there will be limited care for their child after they have died, and that their child will never have a tremendous quality of life. that judgment is not Palin's to make.

November 17, 2009 3:25 PM  
Anonymous buzzwhack said...

The GOP made a big mistake choosing her as running mate. McCain pretty much vaporized once Sarah got going. Just made the Reps look even more reptillian and out of date than usual.

November 17, 2009 4:29 PM  
Blogger OmemeeOzzie said...

One of Maggie's hairballs would suffice...

November 17, 2009 5:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmm... the first time they announced her as McCains running mate. I was like, smart move McCain, a great idea, then I sat back and waited to see what she was like in the media's view. I withheld judgement.

Then I said to myself, now this one is a solid nutter. A sociopath, if I have ever met one.

If you get a chance, read the book, the sociopath next door. It describes Sarah, to a tee. SCARY!

November 17, 2009 10:44 PM  
Anonymous jmd said...

An anagram of Sarah Palin is "a sharp nail". I think not.

November 18, 2009 8:26 AM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

I just threw away a bunch of letters and got 'ars'.

That'll do.

November 18, 2009 8:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

or "piranha" if you throw away 3 letters. Oh hell, let's just toss the dumb bit@h. Isn't she over yet?

November 18, 2009 9:27 AM  
Blogger OmemeeOzzie said...

I believe most would arrive at the same conclusion -- whether letters were discarded or not.

November 18, 2009 9:28 AM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

The word 'piranha' is not allowed in our home.

It is the one that stopped Nika, Arlene and I cold in the Spelling Bee in May.

I do think the wine had something to do with it, though.

Except I can spell 'wine'.

November 18, 2009 9:31 AM  
Blogger OmemeeOzzie said...

Correction. I believe that the correct spelling for you might be 'whine'.

November 18, 2009 9:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Arlene?!? Are you kidding? I shall say nothing further.


oh, and that was my post about the purrhanna.

November 18, 2009 10:35 AM  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home