I have grown weary of our regular horoscoper, as you all know. And last week was too much work as I plopped on my horoscoper hat and did the work myself. There is a reason it is easier to copy off the guy beside you than study all night. So, to keep all the excitement intact, and give all of you the direction for the coming week that I know you need - need - like air and wine and waffles (I made that up; I don't even like waffles, but someone might), I simply pulled the first thing I found on Google. As always, the order is the one I prefer. Me first.
Capricorn: As you experience a burst of energy this week, Capricorn, you are instructed to aim high. While 'aiming high' often means showering by noon, apparently this week will not only be full of buzzing possibilities, it will also present a curve ball or two. You must use your words to come out on top. You also might as well remember now that playing it safe never got you anywhere.
Aquarius: You are being instructed to let others feel they are in control this week. Some call this 'sneaky and manipulative', but my mother used to call it letting Dad think he was boss. It works. You're set for some decent financial news this week, too. Can I borrow some money?
Pisces: Shhh. Yes, be quiet. Your friends, at midweek, are trying to tell you something. Something good. They have more faith in your abilities than you do, so shut up for one minute and listen. From Thursday on social stuff gets rolling, and you will be smart to accept. So I guess nothing much happens the first few days, so rest up.
Aries: Oh. I would like this to be Capricorn's. Aries, you are in for a lovely session of 'creative growth and change'. Your career is revving up this week, and for once, sticking to your guns on what you know is right for you will pay off. Dig in your heels (in that nice way you have) and know that you are right. You little warrior, you.
Taurus: You get a new friend this week. Or new somebody. The thing is, this person shares your vision and will be an ally. It's a week to focus on your career, and while you totally prefer to work alone, there are times it makes sense to join forces with those who can help you. Define what you want, and go for it.
Gemini: That great idea you have? It's a good one. But you can't do it alone, so pay attention to someone who can help. You're also going to be dealing with some crankypants later this week, but hold your tongue and you'll win. Take a wait-and-see course before committing - you're not seeing all the pieces just yet.
Cancer: Wow. Another sign being told to take someone else's advice. For you Cancer, it's not a newcomer - it's someone you already know. Something you've been mulling over for awhile now is coming into the sun. Take good advice that's offered, and this should be a successful week.
Leo: Remember that idea you had to file away? Haul it out. Make a plan to finish it. You'll be hearing good things from old friends and new contacts alike - they'll all play a role in helping this project work. But if you take a boo around the other signs here, you'll see that everyone is looking to find success in personal ideas, to it's going to be a give and take scenario.
Virgo: Well, Virgo is the only sign so far that's getting any romance, based on these readings. Sigh. Then again, Virgo, things could get a little bouncy mid-week with one of your close relationships, so ease up on the throttle and don't make things worse then they are. You're headed for smoother seas.
Libra: Someone who loves you says you can't do it. It can't work. It can, but you need to carefully explain why it makes sense. You need them involved in this, so don't get all snitty and bratty. Use all that charm, stay calm and you'll have them as an ally.
Scorpio: You have an inkling that someone isn't really okay. Trust that; they're not. But if you open yourself up a bit, and make yourself a little vulnerable, you'll both end up far richer for it. Stop being scared of the V word.
Sagittarius: Oh, you're in for some surprises this week in your personal dealings, which will totally muck with your carefully planned out route through life. Relax; these will ultimately be good things. Something cool is set to happen in your career on Friday - yeehaw!