March 22, 2011


It's about the cats....



Every morning I am waking up to Q-tips all over the house. One on the stairs, one under the couch, a couple in the bathroom. They are clean but a little the worse for wear, and I keep chucking them and yelling at everyone to stop leaving Q-tips lying around.

And every morning, same thing. But today, I finally figured it out. I caught JoJo sneaking out of the bathroom - early -3 Q-tips in her wake. She's been fishing them out of the box in the drawer. I did not think she was bright enough to even jump on the counter, let alone help herself to toiletries. So now I know.

We had to cut the cats' claws last night. We call it a manicure, because JoJo will run and hide if she knows what we're about to do. She's probably stealing all the Q-tips to clean her ears out so she can listen better. Maggie will basically hold out each paw, grit her teeth and glare at you as she hisses "get it over with". JoJo cries and wails and hides, shuddering and sobbing that we're trying to kill her. Maggie thinks JoJo is an idiot.

So what happens is we get to Maggie one day, then have to wait for JoJo to forget what we did so we can get her. But whichever kid has to hold JoJo has to wear chain-mail and get a tetanus shot - she is a big girl and she squirms. Hard. We often only get a few nails clipped, and I can never remember which ones. JoJo knows I'm writing about her. See her crabby little black face?

13 Comments:

Blogger djc said...

Glad to hear that someone else has cats like ours! We had a cat that would steal a bag of 6 bagels, carry them upstairs, hide under one of the boys beds and proceed to nibble on each bagel. Of course, we would berate the owner of the bed the bagels were hidden under. He is also a diabetic who should not be sneaking carbs at night. Cats can be evil! Never forget; dogs have owners, cats have staff.

PS: our cat is also a leg warmer. She insists on sleeping between your knees when you lie on the couch.

March 22, 2011 3:03 PM  
Anonymous buzzwhack said...

The black cat is planning to do something nasty to you Lorraine. Check your will, watch the steps of the staircase, Be careful of opening doors. She means business!
PS got a real word today for password, "cheer"

March 22, 2011 3:35 PM  
Blogger Chris Brown (not the felon) said...

"Juan step closer, I keell you!!"

How appropriate. My word is catidses. If you have a cold it's what you say when you see two cat sisters kissing.

March 22, 2011 3:56 PM  
Blogger royal said...

We have five of the monsters and try, diligently to clip their claws every two weeks. Sheryl hold/ties them up. I wear safety glasses and gauntlets as I clip, keeping count the whole time. I take a Benedryl before we clip claws. I'm allergic to the beasts and a scratch reacts badly on me.
Our biggest is Merlin, a 10-year old Maine Coon. We rig up a pulley system for this endeavour... he is 25lbs. It is an exhausting task and one neither one of us enjoys. We do, however, love the felines - after the fact.

March 22, 2011 5:43 PM  
Blogger Lucywestie said...

Im pretty sure thsi will make someone retch, my little dog, half terrier, half freaky hairy other thing, has a taste for underwear thats fresh from the gym. Yup, if I miss the laundry basket with them sweaty undies then you will find her about 20 minutes later gladly snacking on the crotch in the living room. Not what you want your guests to find when they come to visit and you forget to look for your dog...

March 23, 2011 2:46 PM  
Blogger djc said...

Lucy, the only thing that I can use to describe what I am feeling right now is "the word" WGJ gave me.

icragrad

Definetly reads like retching.

March 23, 2011 2:52 PM  
Blogger marcelleqb said...

I found bribes always work. You have to do it everyday to start so they can remember the reward. Usually, after about three tries, they get it. So, grab a cat, clip a claw (or two, if you can), give 'em a treat (something they really love). After that, you'll get mutters from your cat, but they'll put up with it as long as you honor the contract.

My Edison used to steal toothpicks. We didn't discover who was the culprit until one day, when we were playing scrabble. Edison popped his head up above the table and very carefully selected one toothpick (with his lips), pulled it out and took off. god knows how many toothpicks he had to mouth before he perfected the technique, or how many we used...

March 23, 2011 3:19 PM  
Blogger royal said...

Wow... I just noticed I showed up as 'royal' for my comment - has to do with a Google account I have set up for Royal Botanical Gardens; it's me Ozzieschmozzie!

March 23, 2011 4:29 PM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

You think we didn't know who that was?!

Ha!

March 23, 2011 4:40 PM  
Blogger royal said...

Hell I had no clue and I'm me!

March 23, 2011 5:35 PM  
Anonymous Roz said...

Ozzieschmozzie. I like that name better or was that just a schmozzie typo? my word is rerri, like, that comment by Lucy was rerri, rerri gross.

March 23, 2011 7:23 PM  
Blogger royal said...

No typo, Roz; you'll recall that your sister spilled the beans on what you call me a log time ago...

Even that may be incorrect...

March 24, 2011 9:24 AM  
Blogger royal said...

Typo was in the above comment. Damn wireless things that require an occasional battery change.

March 24, 2011 11:19 AM  

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