Me: "Hi, Rogers? I put a text package on my kid's phone, and it is now apparent that he will not be needing 100 texts. It seems he only needed one, to say 'I'm here, I'm turning off the roaming now' and that is that. However, my other kid is going to the States today, so can I transfer that package over to his phone, or better yet, just let them share it? It's all on the same bill. It's all the same account. I pay it."
Rogers Rep: "No."
Me: "Did you get what I just asked you? It makes sense to me. I've been a customer since 1990. My account number is something like 4. How can you not just use this package on 2 phones on the same account? An account that you have hosed me on for decades. It's like I've paid for 22 years of orthodontia on these phones."
Rogers Rep: "I heard you. No."
Me: "I'm aware you don't make the policy, but this makes no sense to me. I just want you to either move the package over, or apply it to the account rather than the phone. Please."
Rogers Rep: "No."
Me: "You got a supervisor there?"
Rogers Rep: "Yes. One moment please."
...cue stupid ads for more Rogers products, which I'm totally in the mood to buy now, obviously...
Me: (After waiting 5 minutes during which I've watched Christopher pack for his first long road trip alone by loading into the car his laptop, a backpack and a granola bar. He'll be gone for 6 days) "Stupid Rogers, I'm too busy for this...." and then I hang up. I got to suggest to Christopher that he might like to put in a jacket and some mittens.
Two minutes later, the phone rings.
Rogers Boss: "Ms. Sommerfeld? This is Rogers calling. You wanted to speak to a supervisor?"
Me: "Uhm, yeah. I gave up waiting. Thank you for calling me back though I'm a little creeped out now that you phoned me back on my home phone (I said the part in italics to myself)."
Rogers Boss: "My name is Can't Remember. What can I help you with?"
Me: "Well, I'm told that I can't use a text package I purchased on my account for a different phone on that same account."
Me: "But that makes no sense to me. It's one account; it's a certain number of texts, which expire, and both my kids are in the States and should be able to use them."
Rogers Boss: "No, that makes perfect sense. Once those packages are out of Rogers areas you are dealing with totally different companies and we can't just switch things out."
Me: "No. I bought this from you, on your website, under your banner. Totally different companies are your concern, not mine."
Rogers Boss: "Lorraine, I suggest you look into something like Wikipedia to understand how these things work."
Me: "ARE YOU KIDDING ME? DID YOU JUST TELL ME TO USE WIKIPEDIA AS A SOURCE FOR WHY YOU'RE RIPPING ME OFF?" I may have raised my voice a little here. "I won't even let my kids use Wikipedia as a source for homework. Have you heard of Stephen Colbert?"
Rogers Boss: "I'm just trying to make you understand why what you're asking couldn't possibly work." I got the distinct impression he hadn't heard of Stephen Colbert.
Me: "Anything can work. You're being ridiculous."
Rogers Boss: "Madam (note: I've gone from Ms. Sommerfeld to Lorraine to Madam in about 25 seconds) I'm sorry you feel that way."
Me: "You're sorry I feel that way? What you are telling me is ridiculous. You make all these commercials about happy families all sharing minutes and plans and how awesome it is, and yet the first time I ask a very straight forward thing about sharing a plan, somehow all the happy sharing families go out the window."
Rogers Boss: "I'm sorry you feel that way. You are entitled to your opinion."
Me: "I'm aware of that. You are reading off a script and handling me. Do you really use those lines and have them work, ever? You've explained nothing coherently, you've requested I take myself off to Wikipedia to have one of your policies explained to me and now you're reading lines off a How to Manage a Bitchy Customer poster?"
Rogers Boss: "You're obviously intelligent; but that is our policy."
Me: "I know I'm intelligent. I don't trust Wikipedia. But you do, and you even recommend it. That makes me nervous."
Rogers Boss: You are entitled to your opinion. That's what makes this country great."
Me: "::thud::" (Yes, those were his very words. He actually said that. I could practically hear him turning the page in the training manual)
Me: "You're a Conservative, aren't you?"
And then I hung up. And no, I didn't get what I wanted. And no, I shouldn't have said that. But Rogers, you failed today. And the only thing that saves you is that all cell companies are just as bad. I can't believe my bills keep climbing, the service keeps getting worse, and you don't even pay for my blood pressure meds.
Labels: rogers texting packages