Because Tim Dowling is brave enough to admit he's not an alpha male, I'll link his post today. Why do I like him? Because he says things like "[I'm] someone who calls himself a house-husband because it sounds better than agoraphobic."
He also goes on about how after a radio show, on the ride home, he thought up all the things he should have said. The other night, I sat bolt upright in bed (Maggie was dismayed; bolting musses with her snuggling up to my arse) and realized why people become writers: it's because we want a chance to say all things we weren't witty or sharp or smart enough to say at the time. We simply want the chance to revise every conversation we've had and have the perfect comeback.
Sometimes you need several characters in order to do this, hence books with several characters. Have you ever read a novel and said to yourself, "Self, every character in this book is speaking the same way. Whether they're a ten- year -old boy or a 82- year- old woman, a cowboy or an accountant (though as you know, I've read far more tales about cowboys than accountants) and realized the dialogue is all the same? This is proof the author is simply revising his past conversations to witty them up. He is merely sprinkling his better answers around amongst the characters he has invented. Personally speaking, I do not like this. If I read a book and all your characters sound the same, I will not read any more of your books. I know the impact of that statement: I do not hear any presses grinding to a halt.
On another tangent (what? When have I ever stopped at one?), Ari is on his way home from Tennessee and the Robotics Championship. They came in 2nd out of 54 teams, which is awesome. But he just texted me a pic of a medallion that says 'first' on it. I have no idea if they actually came in first, or if he beat up the first place team and stole the medallion. Or had the robot do it.
I was watching some of those American political talking head shows this morning. I'm wondering why any of the Republican strategists can't just come right out and say "I saw my shadow, I'm going back in my hole until this whole thing blows over. I thought Sarah Palin was bad; I'd give my left arm for Sarah right about now. Next to this field of shellacked-out, whacked-out, twist and shout unprincipled nutbars, she's looking pretty good."
I must admit, I think it is stunning - stunning, I tell you - that with the economy doing what's it's doing, unemployment where it is, people homeless and records numbers of the population on foodstamps, the primary focus of American politics is the birth control pill. Wow. I've got news for some of these ridiculous men: the only thing worse than finding out your sexually active daughter is on the pill is finding out she isn't.
Moving right along...I've been trying to sort of clean on weekends even though my living room is unnavigable due to it being the central holding area for Operation Bathroom. There is dust everywhere, but I made a pretty concerted effort yesterday and got the kitchen and hallways cleaned up. I thought it looked rather amazing. A friend walked in and said 'Wow, this place is unreal. The mess must really be getting to you by now." The word amazing can cut both ways, it seems.
Christopher is visiting friends in Ohio. I have received a single text from him ("I made it over the border!"), then nothing. Border crossing had been a worry because his passport expired in the summer. I told him to renew it 3 weeks ago, so he didn't. He was heading over with a birth certificate and a driver's licence and a prayer. As his nerves mounted, he was asking what he should tell them. I suggested the truth, as these people are trained to notice people lying. Especially ones who are sweating and making it up as they go along, then backtracking and changing the answer. This is how Christopher lies. If he can't lie to his mother, he can't lie to a border guard. I also reminded him that a big kid in a USC hoodie who looks like he stepped off the Leave it to Beaver set driving his mother's Santa Fe is probably not going to set off many alarms.
I should either go work out or do some writing.
Sounds like a great time for a nap.
Labels: Tim Dowling